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Just say no, BDSM hard limits urethral sounding

In a relationship far far away I had a partner who would from time to time ask me to sit on his face. I would oblige, not because I enjoyed it but because he seemed to and if he got something he enjoyed then maybe I would to. However, in all the times we did it, I never ever ‘got it’. What he found sexy about it utterly eluded me and what I was meant to get out of it, also eluded me. I would make the right noises, after all there is no point in joining in, if you are not going to give it your best shot, but invariably I would be sitting there feeling a bit silly, oddly exposed and running through my head would be the questions. “Why do people like this alongside, how long do I have to do this for?” I know, not a great sex moment for me and I look back now and realise that we were both really bad at communicating when it came to sex but that is a whole other blog post, so back to face sitting.

The motto of this story is, if I had known then what I know now, then I would have probably have understood better why sitting on his face bored me and did absolutely nothing for me sexually whatsoever and that is because there is absolutely nothing about it that taps into my submissive kink. I used to listen to him licking away and think, I am sure this is meant to be hot and turn me on but it doesn’t, not AT ALL. You see I had absolutely no idea about being submissive, not only did I not know it was the missing piece of my ‘sex jigsaw’ but way back then I didn’t even know it was a thing. Truly, no idea.

Today things are very different for me. I have not only discovered my submissive kink but I have found a loving partner to explore it with. I have, and continue, to learn about my sexual kinks and as a result I now have a satisfying, rewarding and hot sex life and with that comes knowledge and understanding, not just of the here and now but also of the past. So much of my past frustrations in sexual relationships, my lack of arousal, my bemusement at certain act, such a facesitting, now make complete sense to me. Facesitting, a bit like being on top, left me cold because there was nothing about it that tapped into my unknown submissive kink. However, I’ve discovered that with the right partner, who knows how to put my head in the right space, being on top can work for me, after all having someone hold you by the throat and guide you up and down on their cock is likely to make the sub in me sing a happy song but this has not been the case for facesitting. To be fair it is not something we have tried but I just can’t imagine it working for either of us. Just the thought of sitting on his face seems so utterly absurd to me that it makes me giggle. It is like when I tease him about spanking his bum for a change. He will reply with ‘give it a go if you like’ but I don’t because I know I would pay for it and not in a good way but more importantly, it just wouldn’t work for me and facesitting feels exactly the same. Thank you, but no…

Just say no, BDSM hard limits

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  • Molly Moore - Author, Blogger, Photographer, Speaker, Director of Operations @Eroticon Find me in my corner of the internet at Molly's Daily Kiss and on Twitter @mollysdailykiss

  • Show Comments (3)

  • Malflic

    It’s probably not nice but I did giggle
    at your thoughts on how much longer do i have to do this commentary. The again this one doesn’t work for me as a kink either so can totally relate.

    • Molly Moore

      Oh it as meant to be funny, it was funny. Even at the time I can remember having to stifle giggles on the odd occasion and certainly since then I look back and it makes me laugh


  • sub-Bee

    For a long time, even still now if I’m honest, I feel as if I’m a little odd because being on top, face or otherwise does absolutely nothing except make me feel uncomfortable. Perhaps that’s because it makes me feel in control and that isn’t what makes me tick…I’d never really thought of it like that before!

    Very occasionally I have sat on his face and it’s seeing his enjoyment that makes it enjoyable. We often end up giggling so it’s fun but not a turn on. In fact we are so out practise that when taking the image for my post I actually sat over his eyes and not his mouth…ooops!

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