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It’s my kink, and I’ll cry if I want to
Cry if I want to, cry if I want to
You would cry too if kink happened to you

The moment I saw this month’s prompt that song instantly leapt into my head and I couldn’t resist tinkering with the words a little. However despite writing that if we using this definition…

“Dacryphilia (also known as dacrylagnia) is described in Wikipedia as being aroused by tears or sobbing.”

then I would have to say that it is not one of my kinks because despite the fact that crying and tears do feature in our kink it is not the actual act of crying or the tears that are produced that are a turn on but more the scenario that has led to them occurring and what they represent in those moments.

I don’t ever remember crying as a result of sex, or orgasms or kink play before I met @domsigns. I do remember feeling utterly shocked the first time it happened as it was the result of a series of intense orgasms that seemed to unlock something within me, the emotion of the moment combined with the sheer physical power of what just happened causing tears to erupt in huge sobbing, breathless, gulps as he held me tight in his arms until I finally calmed and on that occasion, like many since, slipped into a deep sleep.

It is not usual for our kink play to also get a similar response in me. I guess if you were an outsider, peering in through the window and watching the scene without any audio it would be easy to jump to the conclusion that the tears were as a result of fear or pain but that is absolutely not the case. As with orgasms it is about release, about feeling utterly and completely laid opened, exposed, vulnerable, accepted, loved and understood. There is something so powerful about that moment and those feelings that they often trigger a base physical release which is often laughter as it tears or @domsigns favourite which he calls crylaughing when both happen as the same time.

I know that when I cry when he is spanking me it is a massive turn on for him but as is so often the case this Kink of the Week prompt lead us to having a fairly long and in-depth conversation about that and it turns out that, although the tear-stained face, watering eyes, and totally vulnerable look is hot to him it is in fact the act of taking me there, of getting such a dramatic response out of me that really makes his blood pump. His favourite thing in life and therefore in kink is subverting expectations and so for him doing something that takes me so far and so deep into myself and the moment, that causes me to lose control, that is what really works for him.

For me, well, having pondered this for a week or so now I can’t say I enjoy the tears per se, being a blubbering snooty mess is not enjoyable, I get sore eyes and a runny nose and sometimes even one of those crying headaches but even so those moments are precious and oddly wonderfully because they are me at my most naked. Not physically so but emotionally so and I am lucky to have found a partner that not only can take me to that place but that I feel utterly safe and protected by him when he does and is not freaked out when it happens. To me that is a wonderful and amazing thing.

Woman in bondage cuffs cryingKink of the Week badge


  • Molly Moore - Author, Blogger, Photographer, Speaker, Director of Operations @Eroticon Find me in my corner of the internet at Molly's Daily Kiss and on Twitter @mollysdailykiss

  • Show Comments (6)

  • Charlie

    That photo is incredibly powerful x

  • Marie Rebelle

    Like you said in your comment on my post, Lord of Tears, we seem to be once again on the same page with this. I don’t enjoy my tears either, but it is a release to me. It makes me feel clean afterwards. And yes, Master T feels the same about my tears as DomSigns feel about yours.

    And your picture… just beautiful!

    Rebel xox

  • Flip

    I’m finding that I actually do enjoy the tears these days, and it;s only because Sir has instilled in me that it’s ok to be that vulnerable and open with him. It’s not going to scare him off, it’s not going to have him run for cover….he is proud of me for showing my tears to him, for feeling able to be that strong for him.


  • sub-Bee

    I was so looking forward to reading your take on this, then ‘things’ got in the way and I didn’t get a chance to read it until now!

    One day I will allow myself to go with the flow and stop fighting the tears back, I know he doesn’t see my tears as a weakness but I still do. I can see the frustration in his face when I won’t allow him to see me at my most vulnerable.

  • Ernest

    Intense deep profound poetic on the edge
    But where is love?

    • Molly Moore

      Love is in every tear drop. It the foundation on which our whole relationship is built


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