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“If I wait for someone else to validate my existence, it will mean that I’m shortchanging myself.” ~ Zanele Muholi

No more. I lived this for many years. When I was young denying my attraction to women because I thought you were either straight or gay and I knew I liked people with penis a LOT so hid the other parts of me because there didn’t seem to be a place for them.

The same can be said for monogamny and kink really. For years those parts of my sexual self that encompass those things was hidden. At times so deeply that they were even unidentifiable to me until eventually they were not and I would seek out something to try and fulfil something in me that was missing. That is definitely what led to me cheating during my first marriage for example.

This time last year I wrote this post about how and why I had carried a deal of shame about my sexuality throughout the years but that I had no arrived in a better place of self acceptance and understanding.

Covid has basically been a massive sex exploration block but a year on I feel even more confident in my queerness despite not aving much opportunity to really explore it but I feel comfortable with it. I have spent years hiding it, being ashamed, confused and even denying it at times because well I was in a relationship with a man, how could I claim to be anything other than straight?

I know better now. I am queer enough because I am. I don’t need someone else to decide that for me. I don’t need anyone elses permission to be queer. I just need to know it for myself and embrace my queerness with confidence.

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  • Molly Moore - Author, Blogger, Photographer, Speaker, Director of Operations @Eroticon Find me in my corner of the internet at Molly's Daily Kiss and on Twitter @mollysdailykiss

  • Show Comments (9)

  • LittleSwitchBitch

    LOVE this, Molly <3 I adore the shot(and the edit) but I love your words even more <3 x

  • mywildlens

    What an incredible image! I LOVE the colours, they just sing! I am glad that you are able to own your queerness with pride and confidence. I hope that as we come out of covid you will be able to explore it if you want to, and that your confidence will keep growing!

  • Victoria Blisse

    You are queer enough and so am I. Thank you for this affirmation. <3

  • Jayden R Vincente

    Love this! It’s freeing to recognize those things in yourself.

  • Exposing40

    Amazing photo but as an aside the Zaneli Muholi exhibition at the Tate was astounding! I love their work. Once it’s done its world tour it’s returning to the Tate and I’ll definitely be going again.

  • Modesty Ablaze

    Very clever effect on your tights Molly!
    But loved reading your words … AND the back story which I somehow missed the first time round. V clearly didn’t know what she was / has / is missing!
    I’ve never been very good with labels, but have always just been “different”. And to me, being different means having the freedom to choose whatever just feels right at the time. And oh how I wish being different was “normal” for everyone.
    Enjoy !!!
    Xxx – K

  • Gemma Jones

    So many things in my head looking and then reading. Great image and great words.

  • Bee

    Funnily enough, I agree with your words, seeing as I said something fairly similar myself.

    But, I bloody love those tights, I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned that before 😀

  • Quinn Rhodes

    I’m so glad that you’re embracing your queerness with confidence – that makes me so happy. I also love this photo – it’s so fucking sexy.

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