One toy is fun, two toys can be double the fun… the same can be said for two men but for now I am trying to enjoy exploring though possibilities on my own.
Last weeks Sinful Sunday was about masturbating whilst not having a partner with me and how I was trying to focus on enjoying my body and taking time to explore by myself again. It can be so easy to feel disgruntled with the lack of touch and intimacy and allow that to take over your mind set about sex and your body. I miss and crave those thing so very badly and so the missing part can so easily become consuming and you forgot about what you do actually have as a result.
I think that last weeks post might have given the impression that I am doing better at that then I actually am. The missing things is huge for me right now. The deep dull ache for sex, touch, intimacy, pain and kink fills a lot of my thoughts and I struggle with feelings of sadness and anger and if I am honest wallowing in some self pity sometimes too. However one things I often say to other people and have been reminding myself a lot of lately too is to be kind to myself. I am allowed to feel those things. It is a process. I am, in many ways, grieving. I need to take this journey to get me through it and that is OK.
When I posted last weeks image I already knew that this week I would follow up with this second image from the same day. This was not one of those quick morning wanks, or a few stolen moments in my bedroom post shower but leisurely time with my body and my imagination. No rushing, no risk of anyone disturbing me. I had toys and lube and time and some deliciously filthy thoughts of having a MFM threesome.
I also had my camera all set up ready to take pictures. Clearly not the case for every wank because that would be just silly but on this occasion it had started out as a photography session that had ended up with a glorious wank which I also managed to took a few shots of. Most of them were not great but this one, well, I have to admit that I actually really love this image. Many of the ‘wank’ shot I take I think are beautiful but this one actually turns me the fuck on when I look at it so much so that I very nearly didn’t post it because it felt intimate and exposing, and I don’t really mean physically so much as in relations to my desires.
27 comments
What a lovely picture! I can imagine it is really hard going without touch, kink, intimacy, pain right now but you end this post on such a positive (and dare I say wise) note that while you can’t touch each other physically right now, you can touch each other in different ways.
And yet there is a part of me that wants to say… but it is just not enough and that is the truth but for now it is how it is.
Thank you for your kind and thoughtful words
Molly
All of this, Molly. I miss so much of touch and connection. I have to constantly work to manage it and not let it have a detriment impact on my mood. Opportunities to indulge are rare in my house. When I think about the difference between what would help me happy and healthy and what I manage, I sometimes cry.
This image is stunning.
I cry too Honey. I am a long way from happy and healthy in that respect. Love to you my friend
Mollyx
Thank you for sharing it with us! It is soooooo hard to be without intimate touch when you are craving it…a deep, gaping hunger. But the beauty is when you can satiate it…that hunger creates such passion.
Oh yes, when we do finally see each other it is going to be intense
Mollyx
You are grieving and you will experience many feelings as you go through that process, you are right though you must be kind to yourself.
This is a beautifully captured image,
Sweetgirl x
I am thinking of how that must feel and now reaching for some of my toys.
This is a gorgeous image and thank you for sharing some of your deeper thoughts about it all. Thinking of you!
Very intimate and very sexy Molly. Distance is hard but we always have hope and countdowns to the next time we see them.
I wished I could offer some helpful words. This is a rough time for you, but I admire how you continue to go on and share with us the ups and downs. I love to see you in the morning when I check my IG. I love everything you do. THat doesn’t make it any easier for you, just know that we love you and none of us would be the same without you. xoxo
I can see why you like it,such a beautiful image. I know things a difficult at the moment but being honest with yourself and yes being kind to yourself will help you get through xxx
Beautiful photo and beautiful writing.
A delicious fantasy and yes you should love this image, maybe in the future those fantasies could become more than that.
It is so incredibly hard, I love how you keep sharing such beautiful images, thoughts and words with us, thank you x
Where your image is so incredibly sexy, it’s your words that touched me incredibly deep, as these ring true for me:
It can be so easy to feel disgruntled with the lack of touch and intimacy and allow that to take over your mindset about sex and your body. I miss and crave those thing so very badly and so the missing part can so easily become consuming and you forget about what you do actually have as a result.
and
The deep dull ache for sex, touch, intimacy, pain and kink fills a lot of my thoughts and I struggle with feelings of sadness and anger and if I am honest wallowing in some self pity sometimes too.
I need to remind myself of what I have, and stop focusing on what I don’t have. Some things just are what they are, but there are some things that can be worked on, and enjoyed.
Thank you for reminding me of that.
Rebel xox
Glass, sparkles and time for you to play, may not make up for the lack of intimacy and touch, but it’s a beautiful start.
Missy x
This is a very hot image, but your words really made me sad. I remember when my Master was across the pond in Canada and I was in Sweden. Skype video sex doesn’t replace physical touch, smell, intimacy. I am sorry to hear that you are going through such a time of need and want, and have no way to meet those needs at the moment.
This is such a stunning image. I’m sorry again that you’re going through all of this and that your love is so far away. Xx
This is an amazing image for lots of reasons and I am so pleased that you decided to share it. I admire the way that you are open about how you feel and don’t shy away from the raw honesty that often people keep to themselves. missy x
The image is sexy and fun and hot (love the sparkles!) And yet it is your words that have touched me, yet again. I understand the needs you are talking about. I’m living them right now. I do occasionally get cuddles and love from Adam, but his work schedule – and my newly acquired taste for solitude – is such that he seldom sleeps over. And while he is warm and loving, he doesn’t fulfill that need for intimate touch, for kink, for sex. I have my LD Canadian, but he’s just that – long distance. And although V and I are – carefully, cautiously – talking, nothing physical can happen there until a lot more things fall into place. So. I understand, my friend. (hugs & wishes for better days soon)
Lovely image, I really enjoy glass toys and open in so many different ways.
I am really sorry you are going through this, Molly – I really do feel for you <3
I do know, however, when you do get reunited with The Charmer it will be explosive. In the meantime, it can be good to reconnect with yourself and even try new things and then get to try them out together x
This image is beautiful and powerful and very, very sexy. I appreciate so much how open you are about sharing your life and I think you’ll never know how much you help all of us. I am so sorry you are having to endure separation and I know fantasies are never the same as real touch. Sending so much love to you right now. xxx
Such a hot image and I loved the last bit where u mention “that doesn’t mean we can’t still touch each other just in different ways.” – yes and this will make the skin on skin touching even more precious when it next happens
x
That is such a beautiful picture. I can imagine it being incredibly difficult to go without the intimacy and touch you crave. Especially since it was such a big part of your life, so it’s only natural that you grieve this loss. Thank you for posting such an intimate picture and I’m sending you all the hugs you need.
I’m glad that you are taking time to yourself, for yourself Molly. Your words resonated with me and moved me and yes, you are allowed to feel what you feel and take as much time as you need to move through it with kindness to yourself. I hope you can continue to find may ways to touch yourself and each other to meet your needs as they come xx