As I have mentioned before one of the things I really like about the Pussy Pride Project is when it inspires people to contact me out of the blue with their own contribution. For the most part they are from women but sometimes, like now, I get one from a man. Despite this project being about female genitalia I have always felt that there is a need for both men and women to write honestly and openly about this topic and their own individual experiences. If you are interested in writing something for the project then check out the Pussy Pride Project page for all the details and in the meantime here is what the ‘Concerned Cynic’ sent me…
Guest Post
I am married for 25 years, lifelong straight, father of daughters. No pictures of my wife vulva exist, and she would never consent to any being taken.
Do you shave it, or do you like it au natural? Describe it to me?
ME. My wife has never styled her pubes in the time I’ve known her. She has a demure pussy that faces down more than out, with asymmetrical inner lips that protrude somewhat. Her clitoris is not large, and I have never seen her glans. I believe that clit pride will break out soon in our culture. It is already writ large in explicit Tumblr blogs. To an amazing extent, most women who open their vulvas on camera, show no fear or embarrassment. Instead, what I sense is “I am female, feel my power and glory.”
By 2060, fully adult women being naked in indoor pools, and on beaches not visible from a road, will be accepted. Most actresses and popular singers will pose naked. Millions of women will upload their vulvas to the internet. A prude will be a woman who declines to show her face and/or who does not trim her bush in any way.
The woman who began our culture’s Long March to Pussy Power, is Betty Dodson in the USA. You can see her personality at work in the YouTube channel of Carlin Ross.
The vulva is the place where your children begin their life journey, and for that reason alone, the vulva is a sacred place.
Women have been deeply ashamed of their vulvas because they have feared rape and bawdy insults at the hands of boorish immature males. Women who feel safe and strong are not prudish, and the rapidly growing confidence and power of women is why prudishness about the female genitalia is in free fall.
I have read a married British woman explain how at an intimate party, she slipped out of her clothes, opened her legs and let the men look at her vulva, and even part the lips with their fingers. She did not deny that this was a daunting experience. But she also said that the experience left her feeling joyful, proud and strong. The men were in awe of her.
What do you call it?
ME. She and I agree that “pussy” is lewd and affectionate, without being degrading or insulting. That has been our term of affection for many years.
How do you feel about it?
ME. I revere it as the ultimate expression of the Female Principle. It looks inviting, never threatening. To me, it is the most sexual thing there is.
Do you accept it as a beautiful part of you or maybe you are not so sure?
ME. I do, but am not confident her attitude is as positive about it as mine.
ME. No and no. Neither of us has the least desire to alter it in any way.Has anyone ever complimented you on your pussy?
I am very interested in the sociology and social psychology of the human genitalia, because my life journey includes the following peculiarity. I grew up uncircumcised in the USA, where nearly all men born before 1985 are circumcised at birth. The result was that in the USA, my penis was very odd. That seldom led to outright ugly experiences, but I lived in constant fear of ridicule, bullying and rejection. This is why I identify with vulva shame, and women’s defiant efforts to move beyond it. It took decades for me to learn to accept myself as completely normal, and living in a culture whose view of the masculine was warped.
Concerned Cynic
9 comments
You should also write to Penis Project by Malfic.
Awesome post towards this noble contribution.
well-written post with no prejudice !
This is such a lovely post to read from a man that clearly loves his wife very very much.
I love the way that he has so eloquently voiced how he sees pussies and the evolution of awareness of the beauty of individuality and openess that is gradually happening over time.
Wonderful post!
~Mia~ xx
Well done indeed. Interesting read
Interesting read. But why do you feel it’s prudish if a woman doesn’t trim her pubic hair? What’s wrong with pubic hair that it needs to be trimmed?
I have altered the person who wrote this piece to your comment, hopefully they will come by and respond to you
Mollyxxx
Everyone: Please don’t admire me. Instead, admire my mother, my wife, and Betty Dodson.
Regina: Let me correct myself. A woman who retains her pubic hair is not being prudish, but rather demure and/or respectful of What Nature Intended. There is nothing wrong with pubic hair, and therefore no need to trim or groom it. I predict that many women will eventually see their pubic hair as I see it, namely as Nature’s built-in g string. A women with a full bush, and who keeps her legs together in public, is not being disingenuous if she claims that her vulva is reserved for That One Special Man.
I fail to see, concerned cynic, the moral value you impute to pubic hair. Demure?? A woman who lets her pubic hair grow as nature intended it and doesn’t cut or shave it (I take your euphemism “groom” to mean remove, shave, trim) may simply be too lazy to do so, prefer the look and feel of the natural growth, refuse to cater to men’s expectations of how pubic hair should be groomed — whatever.
I’m apparently much older than you. When I was growing up the notion of women doing anything to their pubic hair simply wasn’t current. In fact, in the late 60s and 70s, refraining from shaving one’s underarms and legs represented a certain political point of view and in that context, pubic hair simply was what it was. I was widowed in 2010, and decided about a year ago to start dating again; I was flabbergasted to learn that pubic hair “grooming” is now a thing.
Keeping her legs together in public? I just don’t see the connection. Is that a euphemism for not sleeping around? Or is it a literal description of a woman’s posture? I don’t see whether a woman shaves or not to be a marker of promiscuity.
As for how we “ought” to see pubic hair, anthropologists have explained its evolutionary purpose pretty definitively.
I don’t intend to sound or be argumentative. But in my view you’re making more of pubic hair than it actually is.
Your making more of my comment than I intended to have in it.
My next major birthday is my 70th.
I believe that by the end of this century, it will be legal for adult women to recreate in the nude. Some demure women will accept this fashion if they retain their pubic hair and literally keep their legs together. Some women will do this only in all-female company.
I recall young women not shaving in the 1960s and 70s to make a political point.
Pubic hair is “moral” because it conceals the feminine Holy of Holies.
Moral acts can result from amoral motives. That’s why what you write in your first paragraph does not disturb me.