“Every leaf speaks bliss to me, fluttering from the autumn tree.”
~ Emily Bronte
And talking of bliss…
I don’t need to orgasm for sex to be good or even great for that matter.
The truth is I can make myself come really fairly easily and I can show you, if you are willing to learn, how to make me come but there are definitely things you can do for me that I can’t do for myself. I can’t kiss myself. I can’t hold myself down. I can’t pull my own hair. I can’t dig my fingers into the flesh on my hips while I fuck myself. I can’t watch your face as you push into me. I can’t hear your groan when I tighten round your cock. I can’t come in me or on me. I can come without you but I can’t fuck without you.
I don’t want to have to fake my orgasm to reassure you that I am having a good time. I want you to believe me when I tell you that it feels so damn good. I have definitely faked orgasms in the past, mostly for this very reason, because like most women I have faked it to just help it to be over but as I have got older and had relationships where I have felt able to really communicate how my body works and what I like and need I have no longer needed to fake it is I have a partner who can understand that my orgasm is both hugely important to me but also sometimes not what I need or what.
Don’t get me wrong orgasms are good and I want them. I will happily teach you how to touch me in just the right way so that you can tease them out of my body and leave me breathless and shaking in a wet puddle beneath you but sometimes my body doesn’t want to play. Things have to be just right for me to come and too much focus or pressure on me to do so can have the effect of chasing it away and sometimes I just want to fuck. I want to feel you inside me, I want to watch and listen and know that my body is giving you pleasure and that you are going to come because of me because one of the absolute hottest things to me is in fact your orgasm. Fuck me full of your come and then use it as lube to finger fuck me afterwards and that is gonna get me off. Or tell me how your are going to use me my body to make you come while you hold a vibe against my clit and chances are you will push me over the edge.
When I masturbate one of the things I often (nearly always) think about to make me come is not my orgasm but yours. The thought of your coming on me. The way you sound when you come. How you looked in the mirror that night when you fucked me over the bathroom sink. The way you drove into me as you came in my arse. The feel of your come running down my skin or clinging to my tits after you made me kneel for you. In the dark of the night, with my fingers stuffed between my thighs it is your orgasm that makes me come not mine.