If you have come here from Closer magazine…
Welcome to Molly’s Daily Kiss. My name is Molly Moore and I am a Blogger, Photographer, Published author, Public speaker and Podcaster. This is my main site and is written for adults. If you are offended by nudity and/or frank portrayals and discussions of sex (including images) then this is probably not the place for you and I suggest you click the little red cross in the top corner of your browser or try visiting my non-adult photography site; The 365 Project. Likewise if you are under 18 then this site is really not for you but if you are looking for excellent sex education for young people then I highly recommend you leave here and go to BishUk.com
A few things about us
My husband and I met on-line 5 years ago and embarked on a 18 month-long distance relationship, as he lived in the USA, In July 2011 he finally made the move across the pond and we got married. This is a second marriage for both of us. Our relationship is based on negotiated inequality, in that he is the dominant partner and I am the submissive partner for one very simple reason; because we love it that way. It works for both us. It is a relationship based on trust, love, communication and maybe most importantly of all consent.
On being submissive
I only discovered that I was submissive in my mid thirties when after my divorce I started dating again and exploring my sexuality. At first I was fairly resistant to the notion, not really understanding what it meant but once I started doing research, reading more and talking to people already in kink relationships I realised that being submissive doesn’t mean that I am weak or passive or lesser in any way. To give up control to someone else, to acknowledge your desires and work towards realising them for yourself actually requires a great deal of self-awareness and strength of character. I maybe the sub in this relationship but I am as much a key part of that dynamic as he is, and if you met me you would very quickly come to the conclusion that is nothing whatsoever passive about me.
There are many different types of submissives. We often share similar desires and traits but we are also all unique individuals. Knowing that someone identifies as being submissive does not mean for example that they are also a masochist, or that they wear a collar. Some do, and some don’t. Submission and for that matter dominance means different things to different people. There is no right way of being either apart from the way that works for you and your partner(s).
I wear a collar, of some description, all the time and I do enjoy certain types of pain play. Our D/s relationship is not just in the bedroom however it is something that for the most part passes between us unnoticed by those around us. It is not overt (unless we are in a setting where that would be acceptable) I do call him Sir most of the time, especially at home but also when we are out in public. It seems that no one notices or even thinks anything of it, maybe they think we are time travellers from the 1950’s. However unlike a 1950’s relationship I am not a traditional house wife nor do I desire to be one. He does all the cooking, the kitchen is most definitely his domain, we share the housework, the shopping and the childcare and we both work.
Our relationship is based on a meeting of mutual desires that we both enjoy. He likes to spank me, I like to be spanked. His role as my dominant is to be the strength in my life, to keep me safe, to love, protect and challenge me, to encourage me to grow and learn. Sexually our relationship is about exploring the opposing sides of our kinks together. I have a list of hard limits which are things I would never do and we have a safe-word which if used will stop whatever is happening. Our whole relationship is really about the both of us playing to our strengths. He would make a truly horrible submissive and I would make a terrible dominant. We fit together perfectly in so many ways and he is the best thing that ever happened to me.
My Work
Here on my blog you will find a variety of different things. I am a self-portrait artist and much of my work is displayed here. I also write openly and frankly about our relationship and the kinks that we enjoy as well as about other sex related issues and topics. I review sextoys and I write erotic fiction. I am very proud of the work that I do. I am aware it is not to everyone’s taste but the world would be a very boring place if we were all the same. Please always remember that our relationship is based on consent, nothing shown here is done to me against my will. I am a happy and active participant not a victim.
I also run a number of other projects/sites
Sinful Sunday – A weekly photography meme for sex bloggers to share their work
KissCast – My fortnightly podcast which features interviews with erotic writers, sex bloggers and other erotic creatives from around the globe
The 365 Project – An image for every day of the year which is in its 4th year and where you can find my non adult work.
Anonymous – Do you have a secret to share, a confession to make, a rant to give. This is a space for you to do that where only you will know who you are.
Elust – A monthly digest that publishes a list of the best sex writing on the internet.
Sexbytes – An aggregate site for the most interesting and talked about sex stories and posts on the Internet
My Thoughts on 50 Shades of Grey
I have only read the first book in the series. My husband has read them all. From a BDSM perspective I found it a pretty terrible representation. Ana is young, naive and trusting and Christian has anger and jealousy issues that for me make him utterly unsuitable to be a Dom. I wouldn’t let him near me with a feather duster let alone a whip or flogger. However I also believe that it is a work of fiction, not a ‘How to guide’ and if you read it and enjoyed it then more power to you and if it made you curious about BDSM and kink then great. I would advise that you do some good research though before embarking on either and for the most part I would avoid recreating anything you read in the book. The real positive about these books and the up-coming movie is that is has allowed a more open conversation public conversation about not just kink and BDSM but about erotic fiction and women’s sexual agency when it comes to what turns them on. For that, I thank E.L James.
Why we did the Closer interview
We have over the last couple of years been approached by various journalists to do a variety of different interviews but we have always ended up declining as we have felt uncomfortable about the nature or angle that they wish to take. We did take part in the Channel 4 documentary 50 Shades of Grey: A Sex story for the very same reason we ended up doing this interview, because we felt the people involved wanted to present a fair and honest piece that didn’t portray us as freaks or in an overly juvenile titillating manner. The piece in Closer is not perfect but we hope that we have maybe represented the community of kinksters that we are proud to be part of, in a positive light. We are not freaks or deviants, we are not dangerous or predatory. We don’t care if you are not kinky and are fully aware that it is not everyones thing but just as we don’t judge you for the life you lead all we want is for the same respect to be shown to us.
Media/Work contacts
I offer a very different and unique photography experience (see examples of my work here and here)
If you are interested in having your picture taken by me, would like me to write something for you or just want to drop me a note then you can get in touch with me through my contact form.
5 comments
If I’d known you were in Closer while I was in the UK I would have bought it! Will have to have a dig around for it over here!
Will have to take a look at closer. So glad you have written this Molly and hope that some of those who may have been influenced by the soothsayers about the evils of BDSM and its apparent links to domestic violence see a little of the reality. My main problem with 50 shades was that it wasn’t well written and didn’t seem in any way realistic. However if as you say it helps people explore their kink then all the better.
I enjoyed working with you both on this article so much. You were incredibly articulate and open and I only wish I had had more words to convey your relationship. Most of all it was a joy to see a couple who are so clearly in love and communicate so well. Thank you. love Mel xx
Thank you Mel, it was lovely to talk with you and share a little bit of our life with someone who was so interested and keen to write a fair piece.
Mollyxxx
I enjoyed reading this post and learning a little bit more about you.