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Stripping Away the Shadows

mirror self porrtait in the shadows

This weeks prompt on wicked Wednesday is communication. The prompt actually made me want to write a couple of different posts but today has been my sons 15th birthday and so time for writing has been rather limited however time for thinking, as I got ready for a family dinner, was abundant. As I considered the importance of communication in our relationship and the different ways in which we communicate I realised that my blog actually plays quite an important role.

I have always stated that I primarily write my blog for myself and that is true but if there is a perceived audience within my head then for the most part it is @domsigns. He is clearly not the only audience, but much of what I have written and posted here has in some way or other been an extended love letter to him. Sometimes they are desires and fantasies, sometimes they are a lust filled retelling of things we have done together, sometimes a thank you, often a declaration of wants and needs, and nearly always an expression of love. The blog has over the years played a really important role in my communication with him. I guess the origins of that lay in our long distance relationship. Before he moved here to England we had nearly 2 years of flying back and forth to spend time with one another. The blog was the place that I not only shared that story both all the wonderful times we spent together but also the pain and emotional hardship of being apart. Once he moved here the tone certainly changed but the blog has always been and will always be the place I empty my brain.

It is not always easy asking for what you want, writing a fantasy can be a way of doing that in quite a controlled way. You get to write and formulate your own thoughts and desires as you go and then present them in a cohesive structured way. The same can be said for processing my thoughts about things we have done. Writing about them allows me that time and space to not only relive them but to explore what it is/was about them then really pushed my buttons, or on some occasions failed to work for me. My blog has probably been one of the most important learning tools with regards to my sexuality/kinks/desires and because I have always been motivated to share the truth of myself here with regards to those subjects as well as baring myself to you the reader (in both written and visual form) I am also exposing myself to him. Don’t get me wrong much of what I write and publish here will not be news to him but talking about a subject and writing about it are really two very different things and often our discussions pave the way for me to find the words and construct the thread of what I write and some times it is the opposite in that what I write will be become a subject for discussion.

This post is a perfectly example. Today I have let me mind wander around this topic. We have not had a moment to ourselves to discuss it and so the first he is going to know of it will be when he reads it. Will it surprise him? I really suspect not, in fact, with so many of these subjects he will often declare ‘I already knew that’ which can be very frustrating but then he always has been able to read me like a book but will we end up talking about it more? I am absolutely sure we will and as a result we will have learnt a tiny bit more about one another, after all that is what communication is all about; stripping away the shadows and letting in the light of knowledge.

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  • Molly Moore - Author, Blogger, Photographer, Speaker, Director of Operations @Eroticon Find me in my corner of the internet at Molly's Daily Kiss and on Twitter @mollysdailykiss

  • Show Comments (24)

  • Cammies on the Floor

    My husband didn’t read for the longest time, but when he did, suddenly he is my entire audience target. He still doesn’t read everything, but I have him in mind with my every post.

  • Steve (@SJF102)

    As per a great post. I’m a recent convert to your blog but find it a great place to be always making me think. I could go on and on with platitudes but I’d end up rambling. So thank you for writing and sharing.

    Steve
    xxxxxxx
    xxxxxxxxx

  • Marie Rebelle

    This is a post I easily could have written, as so much of it is true for my relationship with Master T. Even up to the bit of ‘I already knew that’ and reading me like a book. And yes, many of our conversations start from things I have written about and many things I have written about was because we had a conversation. Communication is vital… and fun 🙂

    Rebel xox

  • Flip

    I primarily write my blog for Sir….I find face to face discussions so incredibly difficult if the subject matter is in any way tricky for me to negotiate, and I find writing the blog helps me to find my way before I talk to Sir about it. It helps organise my thoughts, get a degree of distance from any hurt or anguish, and to be able to approach things rationally when I do get to sit, face to face, with him. I rarely share my sexual explorations on my blog, both of us are intensely private and to do so would seem like a betrayal of that, and I often ask permission if there’s something I think he may have a problem with having on public display.

    For me, like you, my blog is a tool of communication, and whilst I sometimes get frustrated my inability to communicate in person, I know that he reads and takes in everything I write.

    Flip x

  • brat

    Hi there molly! I wanted to come say hello, and say thank you for commenting on my post on anal plugs! I am enjoying your blog very much so far, and about to subscribe to you! 🙂

    This, and the other posts I have read so far are great, looking forward to reading more!

    xx
    brat *Amber* xx

  • Modesty Ablaze

    As always, perfectly expressed . . . and always heartening for me (and I am sure many, many others) to read words that reflect our own similar feelings and experiences. You know, that comfort one gets from knowing that . . . “it’s not just me” . . . that sharing, and baring (and I don’t mean Scavenger pictures), helps others, but also, ourselves!
    Lovely . . .
    Xxx – K

  • Malflic

    Writing certianly does give a wonderful ability to share so many things in a way thst can be deeply personal between a few people yest still apply to a larger audience in a different way.

  • Kayla Lords

    I definitely understand about communicating through the written word, specifically my own blog. And I’ve also heard the words, “I already knew that” a few times myself. Sometimes it’s just easier to write it down, edit your words, process your thoughts, and then send them out into the ether of the internet to be read and absorbed.

    Lovely pic, by the way. 🙂

  • John

    I wrote my blog as an escapism; if there was a primary audience it was normally me. And agree, the written word helps you structure your thoughts so much easier.

  • Jade

    ~smile~ I tried to find time for this prompt, but (as so often happens lately) time got away from me. But if I had, it would have been very, very similar to this one. I’ll just send W over here to read. 😉

  • Beauty’s Punishment

    For me, posting on our site has made me get over somethings that I couldn’t no matter who I talked to about it. I think I communicate better with Jolynn because of it also.

    Thank you for sharing Molly. 🙂

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