Rebels’ prompt this week is romance. As per normal these days I have been busy and not had time to write anything and now I sit here staring at a blank white page wondering what the hell I am supposed to write that might fit the moment.
How on earth can I write about romance when the world is going to hell in a hand-basket? Our political leaders all appear to be doubling down into a pile of stinking shit, although there are a couple of beacons of hope in the form of Nicola Sturgeon and Justin Trudeau. America has just cashed in a black liberal president who has battled for 8 years against the Republican parties’ wall of bigotry and hate to try to achieve something worthy, for a man who jokes about sexually assaulting women and has led a campaign based on hate and fear. This is not a time for romance
maybe it is, maybe now is exactly the right moment for romance and love and sex and intimacy because in those things we can find hope and strength and power.
Today I have watched my beloved husband grieve for his country and for all the things he holds true and dear to him. He has cried in a way that I have never seen before and it has truly broken my heart to witness it. I feel so fucking hopeless. I want to make it better, to take away just a tiny bit of the pain for him and I can’t. I offered bacon and a trip to Burger King; he shook his head to both. I know that might sound silly or even trite in the circumstances but it isn’t because it was an attempt to nurture him through these dark moments. Just as I know he would do the same for me.
Romance is not about grand gestures in my opinion and it is definitely not about money. Romance is about the small little things that someone just does. Not for your birthday or valentines (although those things are lovely too) but just because. Romance is when he goes round to the shops to buy milk and comes back with a little bunch of Daffodils for me in the spring because he knows they are my favourite. Romance is when I come home from the gym on a cold winters day and he has run a bubble bath for me. Romance is when he whisks me up in his arms and twirls me around the fruit and veg section in Tesco to the Christmas music. Romance is when he tweets his love for me out into the world. Romance is all the amazing things he has written about me on This D/s Life. Romance is bringing me my coffee in bed when I am sick; cleaning the kitchen when I am out because he knows it will make me happy. Romance is leaving his family, his job, his country, everything he knew to come here and marry me and yes romance is taking someone to Burger King or making them a bacon sandwich when a shit storm of horror just erupted in their world.
I have no idea what the future holds for the world. Trump as President is a terrifying prospect but I do know that my future is with Michael doing the best we can to be the people we are, to raise strong and thoughtful children, to continue to promote and defend the values and beliefs that we know are right and good and true, to stand by those less fortunate than us and to always call out and challenge bigotry and hatred when we see it. Nothing else will do.
We didn’t go to Burger King today, nor was their bacon. Quite frankly they were pathetic attempts to try to heal some of the pain but there was love, there is love, there will be love because that is all I have to offer him today but that counts especially when everything else sucks.