This weeks topic for Kink of the Week is Collaring
I remember the first time he put his collar on me. It was within hours of my first trip to Philadelphia and our big step from on-line to real life. I already had the welt marks from his whip across my arse and a cunt full of his cum. On that occasion he was very clear about the fact that the collar was for my two-week stay and that at the end of the two weeks we would discuss it again. I left Philadelphia nearly 3 weeks later (a very helpful volcano in Iceland kept me there longer than planned) still wearing that collar and have never been without his collar since.
It is funny because if I think about losing my wedding ring I know I would be pissed off, mainly because it cost us money and I like it but if I think about losing my collar I can feel that slight sick feeling in the pit of my stomach start to bubble up. I love my wedding ring, I really do, but oddly I don’t think it is sexualized for me in quite the same way as the collar is. It’s meaning, its power seems nothing compared to his mark around my neck. My collar is the most visual sign of our relationship and my place within it. For most people looking in the various collars I wear they will often pass for slightly odd and wacky neck wear but for anyone in the know they are a clear indication of what I am; his property.
I love being owned, there is nothing sexier to me than to feel his hands in my hair as he twists my face up to him and whispers in my ear ‘Mine’. I want that, I need that, it makes me feel safe, secure, strong and powerful. Who I am, what I am, what I give to him and what I bring to this relationship inspires that reaction in him. It makes me feel so very alive and my collar is the visual public sign of all that and even if no one else knows what it means it doesn’t matter because I do and so does he. When I feel the cool of his finger tips at the back of my neck as he fastens the clasp or snaps the lock shut it never fails to thrill me and also remind me, not that I am in any doubt, of what I am to him. I am proud to wear his collar, to be marked out like that by him because it pleases him to do so, because within this relationship I exist for that purpose. It makes me feel my submission, if I look in the mirror I can see it, if I reach up I can touch, it is on my skin all the time, not hidden from view but proudly displayed.
Of course the collar also has its practical uses within out play and so since that first collar more have been added to his collection.
My day to day collar is a short silver chain with a triskelion pendent. He bought me the pendant after I broke the previous 2 version that had come from The Stockroom and until we were married it hung on a braided leather necklace. On the day we got married he changed it to the silver chain and it has been that way ever since.
The black leather collar with the O ring is worn for both going out and for play
The high neck leather collar is a particular favourite of mine. Often worn for play it is cut away underneath my chin but digs in ever so slightly on either side of the cut away and so if worn for long enough will leave two tender bruised spots on my neck that delights me. It too has a front D ring but also side rings too and has a purple lining and stitching and is part of set that matches the leather ankle and wrist cuffs. You can see me wearing this beautiful thing in my Sinful Sunday post this week.
The chain collar is in fact a man’s arm band found in a fetish shop in Philadelphia which happens to fit my neck perfectly and should give you an indication of just how small my neck actually is
The silver locking steel ring which is fastened by a padlock which can only be opened with the key that he keeps about his person at all times. When I am wearing this he always has the key with him. So many people have commented on this collar, mostly just saying what a unique necklace it is and where did we get it. It always makes us smile when they do, as usually they have no idea what it is they are actually admiring.
Although they get worn for different times and different occasions I just wanted to make it clear that I have worn all of them out of the house, to the shops, to restaurants etc . Sometimes I catch people checking them out, sometimes I even get compliments and on the odd occasion I have even had curious questions none of which I mind in the slightest. I am completely comfortable with who and what I am and will wear them proudly as a result.
So there you have it. Collaring is a massive part of my submission, a huge kink of mine and a very intricate and powerful part of our D/s dynamic. For us my collar is not just a play thing, like the cuffs or the flogger, it is something way beyond that. It is his mark of ownership; it is without a doubt our wedding band of kink.
Ps… Click on the icon below to see who else is joining in with Kink Of The Week and beneath that you can find a list of sources for the various collars I have shown here
Triskelion Pendant – Fet Jeweller
Black O ring collar – Subspace Leather
Cutaway neck purple lined collar – Leather Delights
Stainless Steel Locking Collar – Affordable Leather